30 April 2005


So i'm starting to miss the idea of home...

Garden State has so many thoughts on the subject it really strikes close to my heart. I am starting to realize that i am here in Holland as well as the fact i will never have a home anymore. yes, i will live places and will be with my parents in Texas again but the ideal view of 'home' is something i can never again experience. my chance is up.

I'm starting to miss cbc and it's cool world within itself. i miss mexico, year end parties, and just having the ability to hang out at all times and places. I think i'm slightly scared about entering into this whole new world. i know i'll be fine, get an education, and make friends but i kinda just want to hold on to the ones i've already invested so much in and stay in my comfortable vortex. I'm torn in two ways..maybe more as i do enjoy it so much here in Holland and yet i don't want to become too involved because i too am leaving soon. That's the challange, raising leaders to continue once your gone. it is easy to start stuff here but the problem is finding people willing enough to follow something God has placed on their heart. I still can't shake the idea that i am done with marcus. when i get my yearbook maybe i will truly realize it. i'm done with cbc...i'm done with mid-school ministry. this time next year i will be in arizona adapting to a new lifestyle and place. A place of which i have never imagined myself going ever before. Before i left i thought Alabama or UNT. but never arizona. maybe that is what is so cool about God. He knows everything. he knew a LONG time ago that i will be going to Arizona. He knew i would be having these feelings and typing this now. God is above time. He knows and is all. I guess it just never gets old to hear about how awesome He is.

28 April 2005


Everyone on this planet has a philosophy, theology, and worldview whether or not they realize it. Pablo Picasso once said, “Some painters transform the sun into a yellow spot, others transform the yellow spot into a sun.” The way one views the world as a whole is reflected by how one views the small everyday matters in life.

Some people start out with an ideal of what they want and then work to achieve it in life. This may appear in a want to acquire more in a sense of possessions, status or respect. Others choose to take the more leisurely way of life by starting out with something, such as the yellow spot, and then seeing what will become of it. The American Dream follows the first way of seeking to obtain a large house, kids, and just basically the peaceful “Leave it to Beaver” lifestyle of the new century.

The way more members of our generation tend to turn is in the second attitude. Youth these days tend to not care about anything. Religion, politics, and life are bound to go on and have the youth’s approval to do so unless it fringes on the same principle. Basically, the world is free to go on by itself until it no longer pleases the people who put it that way in the first place. People feel that if they are to be passionate about one thing, then they will have to be passionate about everything while this is not the case. Then, instead of choosing to be involved whole-heartedly by one thing, people choose to not care about anything at all.

It is impossible to categorize humanity into these two concepts as not only are people different, but also, so are the worldviews people hold as everyone has gone through different experiences in their lifetime. Because of this fact, it is also impossible to determine which is better in this world. While one may start out seeing the sun, another may just see it once crossing the finish line. So while I try to find the balance between the yellow spot and sun, I choose to admire all of the differences and mixtures that make up humanity in all of its aspects.

19 April 2005

AHHHHHHH..i'm breathing with my heart here...

nope..not my quote but it is interesting eh?

Thank you all for the comments on my last post. since exceding 21 it is now my duty to write more. I am working on photos and hope you all enjoy. Nurge, there is something special for you in ariel's set.


13 April 2005

Why not?

"If you read this,
you must make a comment of a memory you have of me.
it can be anything you want,
it can be good or bad,
just so long as it happened.
then post this to your journal.
see what people remember about you."

This will remain until i get 21 comments...or at least until i get tired of it and decide to change my mind.

12 April 2005

Serious now.

How do you explain that Allah is not the same as God to a girl claiming to be Christian and yet holding on to Muslim beliefs?

05 April 2005

My bro and cuz

check out here for Justin and Joran's band site..more soon


Ok, so the last question didn't flow so well.

What is another term for watering can in English?

03 April 2005

Next in Line...

Why do ducks look so cool in the Dutch sun?

--not as cool as a platapus might i add.

02 April 2005

Next Pregunta

Why is Ariel Hays so cool?

(because she is associated with a super uber-kool ninja is not an acceptable answer)